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Before Now

by Tai Shan

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1.
Runaway 06:23
It’s a story that you didn’t intent to tell Heartache you threw like a penny in a wishing well It’s the moment you stand in front of your grave and say I can’t run any longer It was in your stomach and you eat it as a child You wanted to tame it but it was too damn wild Fear and insecurity was hung on old clothes racks Never to come back And now it haunts you, stares back from your daughter’s eyes You wanted to tame it but it was too damn wild You can’t stop it can’t watch it as it suddenly arises You want desperately to watch it wash away But time is an ocean Emotion a wave Chorus: We all have our demons running round here inside Keeps us alive And it’s so hard to face But I know you’ll survive If you runaway from yesterday Memories drown me as he mentions the word How can a flame remain when it wouldn’t burn The sky is falling as the sparrows fly south And I’m without a doubt I can still feel the dirt beneath my nails The smell of midnight Inside that hotel I can’t face it so my mind slips away to yesterday Theirs not a damn thing I can do but fight the tears Regrets too good a word for all those years Sometimes I feel as though the sun has gone away And I’m stuck here in yesterday Chorus: You thought it would fade, rust with time You forget how long a monster can stay alive You want the world to just stand still but you can’t run away from yesterday Chorus
2.
Down on Mendocino When the night crawls to fly When the black bird flutters across a melancholy sky She comes a calling Smeared blue with lipstick red Her high heels may be tapping the minuet turned rag Chorus What a blue shade of gray of gray of gray What she’s loosing the night takes away takes away A ghost amidst the legend Her face aged as wine Her wrinkles tell the story of the Man that robbed her blind It true she loved him dearly But his faded eyes did stray And when her lips weren’t oh so supple that fool he ran away Chorus Her eyes slightly fade With every street lite night And every time she opens up Her beauty pays the price Yeah She’ll turn her face away Just to ease the pain But she knows shes nothing more than just a crying shame Chorus:
3.
Sitting in the sand in the middle of the night I’m skipping stones by the riverside And I want you Like a dog want wine And suddenly its sexual its Adam and eve in the garden of the earth and I Want you, like a dog wants wine Face hair and hands Lips and eyes Skin upon skin You’re a melting pot in the Middle of the night Chorus: But you said no attachment But it’s a little too late for that So pucker up darling I’m going to steal me a little kiss I want to love you baby I ain’t letting go So come a little closer Cause I already locked that door I locked that door A few more minutes till I see you again Just one more day and I’m rushing into you babe And into love Your James Bond and I’m Tammy Wynette And we are singing Stand by your man But hey babe stand by your woman I want to go Swimming in the sheets get lost In linen and lace But suddenly you move away and say Chorus: That you want no attachment But it’s a little too late for that So pucker up darling I’m going to steal me a little kiss I want to love you baby I ain’t letting go So come a little closer Cause I already locked that door I locked that door I’m drunk on love I must confess I would never pass a sobriety test With you babe, I’m like a dog with wine And now you want to walk out that door But baby you’ll be back for more You need me Like dog needs wine. Want to kiss me again Well then give on in No free samples no it ain’t Costco And now you say you got to make up your mind. Chorus:
4.
Cinderella 04:09
It’s all an illusion You’re lost in sensation Welcome to my wall I see you watching as I am singing But you don’t see me at all You see the girl who plays her pretty songs You don’t see her as se spends the night alone Chorus: For I am Cinderella Under a spell I will only hurt you As my clock strikes twelve And you find that I am just like everybody else. I’m guilty of witchcraft for mystifying And putting you in this state You think you want me But you want the glamour You can’t differentiate I’ll take you home and in the Morning you will see That I have shed that beauty Chorus I let you a sliver a crystal slipper As my spell dissolved Don’t track her down boy cause you’ll only find her as I’m singing my songs Then you will see the beauty you knew As I sit in the corner and write this song for you
5.
What am I doing here? All you ever do is disappear I’m going to walk out that door I ain’t coming round here any more I’ve got a lover that treats me fine but a Lover is only the lonely let blind Oh I’ve got a lover but love will kill you in time I’ve got a lover for security But lonely is the only thing that he leaves me Oh I’ve got a lover but love will kill you in time Chorus Oh I’ve got a lover but wait, I want to live my life Don’t want to settle down one day I want to live my life Out in the fast lane, No baggage on this damn So tell me why I’m still here Treat me right treat me wrong As long as you don’t leave me hear alone I’ve got a lover but love will never have me Look around obviously theirs a problem with society If you don’t have a lover than you better not come around Chorus: Oh I’ve got a lover but wait, I want to live my life Don’t want to settle down one day I want to live my life Out in the fast lane, No baggage on this damn So tell me why I’m still here I’ve got a lover but he don’t love me And now its up to my creativity Glue in the pieces where the pieces would never fit I should leave this fantasy And walk the plank of reality I won’t do it, don’t make me do it, no, no Chorus: Oh I’ve got a lover but wait, I want to live my life Don’t want to settle down one day I want to live my life Out in the fast lane, No baggage on this damn So tell me why I’m still here Tell me why
6.
Since I was a kid they told me the American way They said you have right never to be striped away Is that the case in modern day? Tell me I want to know are you human or a man Are you a lion or a sacrificial lamb? Do you feel you have done all that you can? Tell me Chorus: It’s your life why don’t you lead it Just one life to live When it comes down to the question I don’t want to know what you gave but what you give In this life will you stand down or will you fight? I know you have kids job, bills to pay Forget the line about land of the brave Tell me how many people did you save Right now Courage, and honor and stand up for what you believe Or is that a little too extreme Have we changed the meaning of the American dream? Tell me Chorus It’s your life why don’t you lead it Just one life to live When it comes down to the question I don’t want to know what you gave but what you give In this life will you stand down or will you fight? Will you protect what others have died for? Someday your children will wonder Did daddy do all that he could for me? Or will you leave duties in someone else’s hands They will fix it I’ve done all that I can You live your life in shame if you can stand it Chorus: It’s your life why don’t you lead it Just one life to live When it comes down to the question I don’t want to know what you gave but what you give In this life will you stand down or will you fight? Come on and fight
7.
Day By Day 03:50
I want to love you baby I want to treat you right Just look to me for security I’ll always treat you right Dance with me here in the kitchen Till you can’t stop blushing at me When embarrassment strikes Give up the fight let go and you will see Chorus: Day by Day I’m going to get you some way Day by Day I’m going to get you some way I want to be the angel To watch over while you sleep When nightmares come hey I’ll be the one to help you count your sheep Let me be the moment A smile dances on your lips Or maybe if I could be the breath After every bright eyed kiss Chorus Let me be the dewdrop That wrinkles your nose tonight Or at least let me be that pestering breeze that blows your hair just right Stroll with me by the ocean Lay with me in the grass Take up my time till it’s yours and its mine Like sand in an hourglass Chorus:
8.

credits

released December 31, 2005

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Tai Shan Seattle, Washington

Tai Shan is an Americana songwriter whose music has been featured in Billboard Magazine, American Songwriter, Americana UK, and on NPR. Based in Nashville, her songwriting focuses on positive messages. Tai Shan and her husband Austin, have toured the United States and Canada and performed for venues such as the Bluebird and Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation. ... more

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